my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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