yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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