i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
