I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize