Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
