did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
