In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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