The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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