watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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