I don't think brook has ever known best
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I AM VODKA MAN
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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