sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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