when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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