Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize