Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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