I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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