just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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