Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
