oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
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hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
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The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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