We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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