I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
