Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
