I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
