If that was your dad, he is hot
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
