Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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