meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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