either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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