I think I died a long time ago.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
that's an acceptable place to lick
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
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