meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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