Who did Billy Mays play for?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Randomize