we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
meet me or not, i'm out of control
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize