k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Randomize
