I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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