great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
