haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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