Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
