its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
this boner is exhausting
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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