walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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