i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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