How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
