you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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