We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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