dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
