SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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