Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
where does the pee come out of this thing
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
