it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
