from now on my penis is your penis
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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