Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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