You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
