Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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