On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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